it doesn't matter who I'm with
it doesn't matter what I'm doing
it doesn't matter where i am
i still feel all alone
I still feel lonely and disowned
I know i shouldn't
I know i cant
I know that i never will
but i miss your arms
i miss your hugs
i miss your kisses and loves
I know they were all a lie
i know they were just a play
i know that you don't care
but when i was with you
i felt safe,
i felt like i could be me
i felt like i could tell you anything
its like i lost so much of me
when i lost you
it doesn't matter who I'm with
it doesn't matter what I'm doing
it doesn't matter where i am
everyone tells me i am better off, and that i will be stronger
that i will survive cause i am STRONG.
to all those that say that you just think i am strong
cause i don't let you see me cry myself to sleep every night
i cover up all my emotions with laughter, jokes, and smiles...
to my family"
I AM NOT MY GOSH DARN COUSIN. YES SHE HAS A DECENT JOB, YES SHE IS RESPONSIBLE BUT ONLY CAUSE SHE WAS AN IDIOT AND GOT HERSELF KNOCKED UP AND HAD TO TAKE CONTROLL OF HER LIFE FOR HER KIDS SAKE. DO I LOVE HER YES. BUT I AM STILL NOT HER I KNOW TO MY FAMILY COLLEDGE AND GRADUATING HIGH SCHOOL ISNT A BIG DEAL CAUSE MOST OF THEM DID NOT. BUT TO ME IT IS. I WANNA BE SOMETHING, I WANNA DO SOMETHING WITH MY LIFE. AND I AM SICK OF YOU BIT**ING ABOUT ME CAUSE IM NOT WORKING ALL THE GOSH DARN TIME. SO TO ALL OF YOU, YOU CAN SUCK A FREAKIN NUGGET, AND LEAVE ME ALONE. DONT TALK TO ME, DONT CALL ME, DONT ANYTHING ME. MY FAMILY JUST LEAVE ME ALONE. AND WHEN I MAKE IT AND I GET WHERE I WANNA GO IN LIFE YOUR NOT WELCOME, YOU CANT SHARE THE SUCESS, OR THE PRIDE. to my family... i am so so so sorry that i am not good enough for you, that im not enough because im 19 almost 20 and not prego or with a kid, i am sorry im not enough because i stayed focused and graduated, and got my but to college. i am sorry that me following my dreams and my hopes is so disappointing and so wrong to you. but all my life that is all i have heard. i have always known that compared to the rest of my family i wasnt like my cousins, i wasnt like you. i just wanna be me and im sorry that isnt enough for my family.
2 comments:
You are strong! You are amazingly strong! And I wish I was that tough with a lot of things in my life. (you most likely know which things I am talking about..) You keep up the good work, you hang in there, and you kick life's butt like your life depends on it!! Cause no one wants life to get the best of them!
oh and your family is retarded... congrats on telling them off!
thanks gurl! That means alot to me. and you dont wanna be strong like me cause it makes you hard. and yeah tellin my family off was great. it felt great.
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